New Year and New Wishes

As we usher in 2012 and we prepare our lists of resolutions for the upcoming new year – some we’ll complete, most we’ll ignore – I have but one thought that hangs on my mind. Actually, it’s more of a wish for all of us to share, and it was inspired by the music playing in our car as we pulled into the parking lot at our hotel this evening.

May your 2012, and every year thereafter, be filled with moments where you try to make the make the world a better place. You know …. shine a light.

May God bless you and yours this New Year. Thank you all so much for the collective hours you’ve spent in sharing this blog with me. Much love to you all.

Such a Sell Out

As the NFL regular season draws to a close, the NBA season kicks off, and the NHL season is in full swing, I find my thoughts meandering ahead to the 2012 Major League Baseball season. Dolphins, Heat, and Panthers notwithstanding, as a Miami fan, I hold a continuous and giddy anticipation for the new ballpark of the new look Miami Marlins.

There’s been much talk – mostly negative – about the new stadium in Miami. An SEC investigation into the issuance of bonds for the stadium, controversy over property taxes for the parking garages built for the venue, and the ad nasueum discussion about Marlins fan apathy; it makes you wonder if any positive energy can be generated in South Florida next Spring. The answer, simply, is ‘yes’.

I’m calling it now. The Miami Marlins will sell out every home game of the 2012 season.

I know you think I’m crazy. I know you think the Marlins have an apathetic fan base, a notion that is only partially true. I know you’re going to fall back on the data and the games in the past where literally only hundreds of people attended.

Before you completely tune me out, however, here are five reasons why the Marlins will sell out every home game next season:

Location, Location, Location

The new Marlins ballpark sits on the hallowed grounds of the former Orange Bowl and in the heart of Miami’s Little Havana. The empty seats of previous seasons were much more a function of geography and logistics than they were a function of fan apathy. Believe it or not, Miami fans care about their baseball team. They just didn’t care enough to spend ninety minutes in traffic to watch a team that often times didn’t contend.

What makes the location of the new ballpark so special is that it’s in the middle of a residential area. Fans can easily drive to a game, park at someone’s house, and walk to the stadium. Also, public transportation is now a much more readily available option that it ever was in the past, and pedestrian traffic is now possible. With the new ballpark, one can easily walk to the game. As a kid growing up in Miami, I remember walking from my aunt’s house off of Calle Ocho to the Orange Bowl. Thirteen city block and just under a mile and a half. The average fan who before didn’t have the means to get to North Miami-Dade County for a Marlins game now has a variety of transportation options available to him.

Miami Loves All Things New

Remember the buzz surrounding the Miami Heat last season? With perhaps the exception of Los Angeles, no other city succumbs to the irresistible attraction of glitz, glamour, and celebrity quite like Miami. It’s as if the city has collective A-D-D. If it’s new and hot and trendy, everyone in Miami wants to be there and be a part of it. The new ballpark in Miami will be exactly that. The water cooler conversations in mid-April will resemble this: “What do you mean you haven’t been to the new stadium? You definitely have to go, bro.” Add in the fact the new ballpark seats only 37,000 and the limited supply of tickets will only stoke the fires of the demand for access to the newest thing in town.

Weather You Like It or Not

Another contributing factor to poor attendance in the past was weather. In the middle of the summer, fans were reluctant to sit in the blazing South Florida sun in a stadium that provides little shelter from heat and humidity. If the forecast called for a threat of rain, chances are the average fan wouldn’t make the commute to the old stadium.

This is no longer the case. With a retractable roof, the new Miami ballpark will make the elements a non-issue for the fans. It’s nice to know there will be no rain-outs or rain delays for the Marlins. It’s also nice to know that even though it may be ninety five degrees outside, the ballpark will be a very comfortable and cool seventy degrees inside.

Local Sabor

It’s no secret Miami is the gateway to Latin America, and the city houses a vivacious, eclectic, and very large Hispanic community. All throughout Latin America, baseball is the national pastime, and for young, Hispanic males, it’s almost a rite of passage. With all due respect to Dominicans and Puerto Ricans everywhere, it’s been my experience the most fervent, opinionated, and, well informed Hispanic baseball fans are Cubans and Venezuelans. Now you have a new ballpark in the middle of Little Havana that is managed by a rambunctious and un-filtered Ozzie Guillén, who happens to be from Venezuela.

We Hispanics take pride in supporting our own, and with a roster that includes superstar Hanley Ramirez, newly acquired Jose Reyes, Anibal Sanchez, Mike Stanton (he’s ¼ Puerto Rican), and home grown Gaby Sanchez, the Hispanic baseball fan will be drawn to the new stadium in droves.

Even the name change from the Florida Marlins to the Miami Marlins aligns with this new approach. Don’t be surprised if, while watching a Marlins game on TV, you see ads for such brands as Goya, Pilon, and Hatuey plastering the outfield walls. I would go as far to say the naming rights for the new stadium, which are in the works of being sold, will be for a company or brand that caters to the Hispanic market. According to the US Census, minorities are projected to be the majority by 2050. You can expect the new ballpark in Miami to provide an early sample of that future trend.

Show Me the Money

The Marlins have made a big splash this off season with a new name, new uniforms, a new manager, and the spending of lots and lots of money. This shows a commitment to winning not previously displayed by Marlins ownership. Part of that was due to a lease agreement in the old stadium that handcuffed the Marlins from being able to complete financially. With the revenues from the new stadium, that is no longer the case. This translates to increased fan interest that, in turn, translates to increased fan attendance.

Still, in the end, it all comes down to winning. Even with the great location, the new, flashy stadium, the high-priced free agents, and the roster with names that end in E-Z, if the Marlins find themselves ten games back by May 1, it will be hard to keep momentum going with regards to attendance.

I will admit Miami fans are fickle. We practically, and almost quite literally, invented the notion of fair-weather fans. And I’ve always maintained in a city with beaches, beautiful women, trendy clubs, and a plethora of other distractions, the fight for the entertainment dollar is a fierce one. If the Marlins aren’t winning, the typical Miami fan will want to spend his entertainment dollar elsewhere (especially if the Miami Heat are running away with the NBA regular season and playoffs).

Still, I believe every seat at every home game in 2012 will be filled, and I’m really looking forward to helping contribute to that prediction.

What I Didn’t Get for Christmas

Having a blended family and split household, Christmas for me means calling my ex and checking what time is good for me to pick up the kids. It’s a good arrangement that works out for the both of us given she has the kids on Christmas Eve and Christmas morning, while I get to spend most of Christmas day with them.

I pick up my kids and they spend the short drive to my house telling me about all the cool gifts they got. I smile as I listen to their grin-filled stories, all the while hoping they were not given one of the gifts that await them at my house.

Video games, art supplies, gift certificates, and as was the case with my daughter this year, a new Kindle; it’s always a joy to live Christmas through the eyes of my children.

As we get to my house, they both eagerly tear through the gifts that await them, and are both thankful and appreciative for what they’ve received. Inevitably, they look at my wife and me and ask, “What did you get for Christmas?”

It’s at that time that I explain to them the philosophy my wife and I share with regards to Christmas presents. We both feel we live a very blessed life, one that includes being able to do most of what we want to do throughout the year. Concerts, weekend getaways, special events, cruises; if we can manage it, we do it. The same holds true for material items. If I’m itching for a something I want, and it’s not going to put us in a financial bind, I usually go out and get it. For us, we celebrate Christmas 365 days a year.

That being the case, we specifically don’t give each other gifts for Christmas. It’s different and did take some getting used to, but we found through trial and error that we were giving each other gifts out of a feeling of obligation and Christmas ‘requirement’. As such, the gifts we exchanged when we first got together were either not practical or caused so much stress in terms of finding the “perfect” gift. Consequently, we decided to simplify Christmas and agree on no gifts between the two of us.

So as I explained to my kids how I didn’t get anything for Christmas, I thought about it in the context of other things recently going on around me, and how the idea of not getting anything for Christmas is indeed such a blessing.

You see, this Christmas, I did not get news about headaches that are result of a brain tumor that requires surgery. I did not get more chemotherapy in an ongoing battle with cancer. This Christmas, I did not get reminded that I will not be sharing the holidays with a child that has passed away. This Christmas, I also did not get an ongoing dramatic saga with an ex-spouse that refuses to take ownership of her actions and act like a responsible adult. I look into my wife’s eyes and remember how this Christmas I was not giving an ongoing and aching tooth that’s required multiple visits to the dentist.

In the end, I look up to heaven and thank God for all the things He didn’t get me for Christmas. And that is the most blessed and humbling gift of all.

Geek With a Capital ‘G’

As a self proclaimed, sports, technology, and music geek, it doesn’t take much to get me revved up. Anything I find cool or fascinating can easily get my geek juices flowing. The complete Star Wars anthology on BluRay, box seats to a sporting event, meet-and-greet with one of my favorite authors, backstage passes to a show, figuring out how to perform a screen capture on my phone; like I said, it really doesn’t take much.

Most recently, I’ve been geeking out about the movies. The American version of ‘The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo’ premiers this week, and Lee and I will be attending a special Tuesday night screening of the film. I’ve been anticipating this movie since I fell in love with the character of Lisbeth Salander and the entire Millennium Trilogy. After I read the first book, I quickly devoured the second book and then the third. I stayed up late watching all three Swedish movie adaptations (thank you, NetFlix), and I, of course, followed every article written and piece of information distributed about the upcoming US film version. I was hooked.

I find myself doing the same with ‘The Hunger Games’. I loved the first book of the trilogy and am more than half way done with the second book. With the movie version coming out in March 2012, I am sure my geek will peak, and I’ll be at the movies opening night for that film as well.

And, of course, there are the upcoming releases of ‘The Avengers’ and ‘The Dark Knight Rises’ that will sure to have me in full-on geek mode next summer. I think I need to add movies to the self proclamation list I mentioned earlier.

There’s something uniquely energetic about letting yourself get geeked up about something. My friend uses the phrase “get’s off” when describing something that is so fun and enjoyable and satisfying. It’s a great way to describe it, but that phrase does come with its share of social awkwardness.

Still, I think the key to the geek out or ‘getting off’ is part of what makes us unique as individuals. It’s more than just likes and dislikes. It’s more than simply a preference of Coke over Pepsi or Burger King over McDonald’s. Instead, I believe the geek out occurs when we’re in tune with ourselves, and the multiple components that make up our personality align perfectly. It’s a controlled euphoria that’s wrapped in a layer of deep understanding and covered with a sprinkle of exuberance and ego. Yes, ego, because every geek moment has, in some shape, way, or form a flavor of, “Look at how awesome this is and look at how much it means to me.”

I have lived a very blessed life, and I’ve been very fortunate to have had my fair share of super-awesome geek out moments. More importantly, I’ve been able to share most of those moments with those whom I consider close to me.

Yet through it all, nothing rivals the how much I get off at seeing my children succeed. The feeling is beyond surreal whenever I watch either of my kids reach a goal or attain an accomplishment. It was my daughter stopping a penalty kick in the playoffs of her recreational soccer league. It was my son standing his ground in the face of an older and taller opponent on the basketball court. It’s watching their eyes as they learn something new; seeing the light bulb go off in their head as they finally get it. It’s being able to see them develop into their own persons, extending kindness to others, and realizing that whatever my ex and I are doing as parents, we’re apparently doing something right.

It’s parental pride.

Keep your sideline passes. I don’t need the VIP tickets. Who cares about the latest gadget? Nothing geeks me out more than having someone compliment my kids because of who they are and how they act.

More Than A Meal

Random Writers: What was your most memorable meal?

I love food. I love eating food. As I look at the mirror and try to wrap my brain around the fact when I graduated from high school over twenty-one years ago, I weighed 100 pounds less than I do today, my love for food is that much more obvious.

It’s tough to try and nail down one meal I’ve eaten in my lifetime that is the most memorable. Seriously? Can you think of one meal out of the thousands of meals you’ve eaten in your life that you feel is the most memorable? I can’t.

I can, however, highlight some very special meals that stand out in my memory. They stand out not so much because of the food experience, but because of the situation or event that surrounded it. I present them to you in no particular order.

One meal that I remember is the dinner to celebrate the college graduation of my girlfriend at the time. It was at a restaurant in New Orleans named Antoine’s, and the experience was second to none. The food was amazing, the service was exceptional, and the overall dining experience set the bar in my mind at to what excellent dining should be. It was my first experience in a restaurant where we had a team of waiters, and the captain did not write anything down. When our meals arrived, our plates all touched the table at the same time. We were served from the left and upon completion of the meal our plates were collected from the right. It was top class all the way, and it ranks as my number one overall dining experience.

There are several other dining venues in New Orleans that provided amazing food experiences; Commander’s Palace, Brennan’s, The Rib Room. I think one of the best things about living there for six years was all the amazing food available in that city. I think one of the worst things about living in New Orleans was all the amazing food available in that city (see aforementioned weight gain).

I also fondly remember the dining experience of when I celebrated the one-year anniversary of my first marriage. We ate at Armani’s which is located at the top of the Grand Hyatt Tampa Bay.  The food and service were amazing, and it’s the only place in Tampa at which I’ve eaten that rivals those amazing dining experiences of New Orleans.

I can probably go on and selectively find a meal here or an event there that was very memorable. But if I had to narrow it down to just one; one meal that really stands out in my mind, I think I have to go with the one Lee and I shared November of 2005.

The restaurant was called Café Tsunami and it was located in Pinellas Park, Florida. I had introduced Lee to sushi earlier in the year, and she was immediately hooked. What made this particular meal memorable, in addition to the perfectly prepared and incredibly succulent tuna and salmon, was the meaning of that night. For Lee and me, it was our ‘starting over’ dinner.

Following eight months of an up and down, back and forth relationship, one in which Lee was surprised of what she wanted for our future and I wasn’t yet ready to let go of the past, Lee decided she could no longer stand to watch me self-destruct, and we split up.

As with all things, God intervened and Lee and I found ourselves at dinner after several weeks of not seeing each other. It was the first step in my growing up and me letting go of the baggage that had been weighing me down. I distinctively remember the feeling I had as the realization of it all swept over me. The best thing to have ever happened to me was sitting right in front of me, and she’d been there all along. I was just too blind and too stupid to have seen it before.

That dinner was a turning point for Lee and me, and I am not sure if I’d be here writing this blog post right now if not for that night. As far as meals go, I can’t think of anything more memorable than a moment like that.

Explosive Sunset

Scoreboard

Random Writers: What is your definition of success?

I am continuously amazed at my ever-evolving disposition and outlook on life. The kid I was coming out of high school twenty-one years ago is nowhere near the person I am today. Dreams, ambitions, goals, certainties; all of those things lie in a box in the backseat of the car we call life.

In short, people change. I’ve changed.

I remember growing up with Alex P. Keaton as my hero. That television character was my role model. Extrapolate the Michael J. Fox connection out to his movie “The Secret of My Success” and you have, in a nutshell, who I wanted to be when I grew up.

Big city job in a fancy high-rise with a corner office. Expensive suits, private jets, and  fine leather briefcase. I was going to be a big-time executive. I was going to be a player in the business world. I was going to be filthy rich. I was going to be successful.

The mental roadmap had been laid out and then, as I and many of my friends are fond of saying, life got in the way.

I look back at the life that, as a seventeen year-old, I wanted to lead and shudder at the idea of me actually living that life now. I look back at everything that used to drive me and everything I used as a measuring stick for success, and all I can do is laugh. Whatever was I thinking?

Again, I don’t think it’s a matter of my thought process at the time being wrong. Money, power, title; those all equated to success for me. To many people, they still do. But my experiences have changed me, and the course of my life has shifted as a result of those experiences. What I considered practical sensibilities in 1990 are not what I consider practical sensibilities today. My outlook has changed. It has evolved, and with every passing day, my outlook continues to evolve.

When I think about how I now define success, I think that it’s something I will never know or realize, and it’s something I didn’t really consider until my father passed away.

We all have our own scoreboards for life. Type of car we drive, the size of the house in which we live, the number of toys we have (i.e. motorcycles, boats, jet skis, etc.). We all define happiness individually, and in many ways, our ability to lead happy lives – to live life on our own terms – is one way to define success. Yet for me, my success will only be realized once I’m no longer alive.

As I read my father’s eulogy upon his passing, I looked out into the church and saw pew after pew of people gathered to pay tribute to my dad. I thought of my friend Carol who shared with me the story of her father’s passing, and how it was standing room only at the church in which he was memorialized. Following my father’s funeral service, I had so many people stop and tell me how much they appreciated my words, and they shared with me their favorite stories about my dad. Person after person. Teary smile after teary smile. My father’s body lay in a casket, but he still managed to fill a room – in this case an entire church – with love.

It was then that it hit me. It’s not about bank accounts. It’s not about portfolios. It’s not about cars, houses, and vacations. Rather, at the end of the day, it’s about how many people want to take the time to pay their last respects and honor the life you lived. My scoreboard – how I define success – is the number of people whose lives you touch, and that are willing to take a moment to say ‘thank you’ and ‘goodbye’ once your time on earth is done.

To summarize using a quote from Hellen Walton, “It’s not what you gather, but what you scatter that tells what kind of life you have lived!”

I will have lived a successful life if at my funeral it’s standing room only.

Every Day is Thanksgiving

As I sit here a week removed the food fest that was Thanksgiving, I wanted to take a moment to jot down some thoughts that have been rattling in my mind. Even though this has been an up and down week with my wife having been away for four days and a head cold that kicked my butt in the middle of the week, I can’t help but think of the many wonderful and amazing blessings in my life. This got me to thinking about how every day should be like Thanksgiving (sans the belly expanding food, of course). We should take a moment every day to just reflect and be grateful. There are literally billions of other people on the planet whose lives are far worse than mine can ever be. So no matter how bad a day I may have, or how crappy traffic can be, or how rude the person at the checkout counter may act, I just need to remind myself to be thankful for the employment that lead to the bad day, the car that put me in the crappy traffic, and the financial opportunity to make a purchase at the checkout counter.

Today in particular, I am so very thankful for:

• My good friend Scott and the lunch meetings we have on occasion
• Living in Florida and being able to wear shorts and flip-flops in December
• Being able to drive with the windows down and the sun-roof open
• Being a part of a wonderful church community in which I can serve my neighbors and be there for them
• My kids sleeping over and being able to hang out with them
• The Interwebs and the fact I am able to share these thoughts with you

Life may not always be great, but it really always is.

A View From My Sunroof