Why We Fail

As the month of January would have it, there are many blogs, magazine articles, talk shows, etc. centered on the topic of resolutions. “New Year, New You.” Now is the time to start fresh with all those things we all have been meaning to do, and I know I have my laundry list of resolutions for 2013.

And with each list of resolutions made comes a list of resolutions not achieved. It’s normal. You can say it’s par for the course with every New Year.  Still, it got me to thinking about all the times, both big and small, that I have not managed to reach my goals.

I’ve written before about how movies have a way of touching our lives and correlating our real world experiences to what we see on the screen. I recently sat down with Lee to watch The Adjustment Bureau – a very underrated movie about an enduring love story – and there was a part of the film that really struck a chord with a particular moment in my life.

[SPOILER ALERT] In the movie, the character of David Norris, played by Matt Damon, is asking the love of his life Elise to trust him and go with him through a door. “I can go through this door alone. You’ll never see me or the people chasing us again. Or you can come with me, and I don’t know what’s on the other side, but you’d be next to me and that’s all I’ve wanted since the minute I met you.”

I lived that moment. Well … something very similar to that moment. A love induced plea to someone, asking them to take a leap of faith and hold my hand all the way through it. It didn’t happen and I went through that door by myself, landing flat on my face, devastated and heart-broken.

I failed.

I will admit it took some effort to bounce back from that event. The road back to normalcy was not a fast or easy one, and it was one that was littered with pain and mistakes that all stemmed from that failure. It was a time at which I stumbled, fell, and stayed down.

What I realize now is that it’s okay to fail.  After all, what is failure if not the building blocks of future success? As I correlate that moment, and all the other difficult experiences in my life, to what I continue to learn in my spiritual journey with God, I find that it’s not about the stumbles we take. Rather, what’s important is our willingness to get back up. What truly matters is our readiness to be redeemed after we fall.

Even Jesus, who chose to put the weight of my sins and my selfishness and my flaws on his shoulders, fell three times on his way to be sacrificed for me. To me, there is no greater or more telling example of ‘getting back up’ than that of Jesus. Beaten, bloodied, and broken, He stood back up to fulfill His promise and redeem me from my sins.

Having the luxury of looking back, now more than seven years removed from my personal rock-bottom experience, and being able to apply the context of hindsight and lessons learned, I know that I would not be where I am today if not for that moment of failure. That door being shut turned out to be the opening to another door that has yielded thousands of wonderful and exciting memories.

Accomplishing your resolutions for the New Year is great, and it’s something towards which everyone should diligently strive. However, it’s important to be reminded that it is not the end of the world if we don’t achieve those goals. The important thing is that we try, and when we fail, we get back up and try again.

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