An Infinite List

“Sometimes I feel at the end of the day / Was it worth while or have I settled for less? / I sit back and you’re there by my side /Sincerely you say, we’re both so blessed.

Count your blessings, count them one, two, three / Don’t give up cause it’ll all work out / It may seem like a strange cup of tea / But if it’s all right with you, it’s just fine with me.”

Those are lyrics from one of my favorite Sister Hazel songs “Strange Cup of Tea.”  Those are lyrics that resonate through my heart, mind and spirit whenever I make the time to stop and smell the proverbial roses that line the path of my life’s journey.  And there are many, many roses to be smelled.

I am thinking about this because I spent a day and a half is a sort of personal funk.  Like the snowflake that begets an avalanche, I allowed a stupid little thing to snowball out of control and ruin an evening between me and the love of my life.  So I did the usual self-justification, I’m right she’s wrong, mental indulgence thing until I was reminded exactly how silly I was acting.  The funny thing is I was reminded by myself.

I saw a friend online and IM’d her real quick.  The chat lead to what I thought would be a quick phone call.  45 minutes later, not only had we both shared our respective thoughts, gripes and lessons-learned about relationships, we also got caught up on a bunch of other things that are of mutual interest to us.  It was at one point were I was trying to give her some advice on one of the challenges she was facing that I actually heard myself talking to her.  It’s as if an inner voice said, “Hey, listen to what you’re saying.”

So I did.  I continued speaking while also taking on the role of audience member.  Here I was giving advice that just a day earlier I was quick to ignore.  It was then that I remembered what makes my relationship with Lee work is the ability to let things go.  It’s the knack-like quality of just zoning out those negatives and focusing on the positives.  It’s having the inner strength to not look backwards and continue to look forwards.  And like a snowflake that begets an avalanche, I allowed myself to be spiritually buried under the colossal snowball of positives in my life.

It’s a great feeling to be able to do that.  At the same time, it’s tempered by the fact that I have several friends dealing with tough, life-altering circumstances.  From battling cancer, to marriages and relationships ending, to people losing loved ones.  I recognize the pain and hardship others are enduring and I pray for them.  Yet I am thankful because relative to their situations, I have nothing about which I can or should complain.  Thankful that I am in a place in my life where I can be anchored in the blessings in my life and be centered by a world of positives.  I feel this allows me to be a better and more giving friend to those around me that may seek my help or advice.

Not so long ago, I was in their shoes.  I was the one crying myself to sleep at night.  I was the one finding the solution to my problems at the bottom of a bottle.  I was the one whose world came crumbling down.  And through it all, my friends were there for me.  Through it all, the blessing was my buddy answering his phone when I called and taking me in when I needed a place to stay.  The blessing was Lee talking me down from the proverbial ledge because I felt so lost, confused and alone.  The blessing was the fruitful valley that lay on the other side of the mountain, a mountain that could only be traversed by following a cold, arduous and at times lonely road.  It’s an honor to be able to re-pay my friends with a ride to and fro, with a phone call, or even with a text message at the right time.  I am indeed truly blessed with so many wonderful and glorious gifts from God.

I could try counting my blessings, but I am certain that in my lifetime I would never finish counting.

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