30 Seconds to Mosh

I went to a 30 Seconds to Mars concert last night.  I have to definitely say it was fucking different than any other concert I have ever attended.  To say simply it was just different would not do the experience justice.  First of all, let me begin by stating that I am just now coming down from the contact high, so I apologize in advance for any typos.  Secondly, anybody got some Doritos?

I have to admit that at first I did not get into it.  Part of the reason is that although I had heard a couple of the band’s songs before, I never really listened to them.  Truth be told, I am not really sure I got a chance to ‘listen’ to them last night either, but seeing them live and feeling the energy of the crowd did make me like them a whole lot more.  It was electrifying and terrifying all at the same time.  Electrifying because the sense of crowd was tangible, and you could feel the mob level rising.  Terrifying because we were standing four people deep from where the mosh pit developed, and you could feel the mob level rising.

As for the mosh pit, it was something I never really understood when I was in college.  I remember catching a couple of shows at Tipitina’s and thinking how crazy those kids were that moshed.  In looking at those kids moshing yesterday evening, I understand it even less.  It’s totally messed up!  However, I do have to admit it was fascinating to watch.  Dare I say I even flirted with the idea of what it would be like to jump into that melee?  After all, you only live once, right?  But it was one of those things where I knew it would be a mistake the very instant I stepped foot in that circle of people.  Needless to say I stayed out and on my guard.

However, as I good citizen, I would like to share with any potential moshers out there the lessons I learned simply by observing the lunacy in front of me.

  1. If anything happens to you in a mosh pit, it’s your own fault simply for being there.  I don’t care if you take an inadvertent elbow to the teeth or a flagrant shoulder to your lower back.  You know the dangers going in, good luck coming out (at least all in one piece).
  2. The skinniest guy is going to get hit simply because he is the skinniest of the bunch.  It’s like the wildebeest with the bad leg.  Everyone knows the croc is going to go after the easiest prey, and that’s exactly what the skinniest guy is.
  3. The problems of the skinniest guy are compounded if he’s high.  Even little women standing 5’2” and weighing no more than 85 pounds will take a shot at the skinny guy if he’s baked.
  4. If there is a big dude who weighs 300+ and has a goatee, STAY THE F*CK AWAY FROM HIM.  This guy owns the pit because he knows no one can hit him hard enough to cause damage.  He’s like one of those video game characters you just can’t defeat.  It’s best to avoid him at all costs.
  5. No matter how hott a girl may be, if she’s at a concert where a mosh pit breaks out, there is something about her that should scare you.  And yes, I was there with Lee.  (Sorry, baby, but you know I’m right).
  6. It’s perfectly acceptable to know EXACLTY where the guys in the yellow security shirts are at all times.  Kinda’ like exit doors on a plane.  You have no intention of using them, but you still like to know where they are.
  7. A lot of people still smoke weed.  This is not so much a warning as it is an observation.  Mosh pits should be renamed to Toke N Poke.

I am sure Leelee and I will catch 30STM the next time they roll through town.  Jared Leto (the lead singer who apparently is also an actor) was very engaging with the crowd.  He was also surprisingly humble and promised to sign every last CD that was purchased there that evening.  So from that aspect, I have a newfound respect for the band.   As for the next concert, I will be sure to sneak in some Fritos snack bags.


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