The Darkness

There he was again, lost in the darkness.  He had been here before.  He knew it.  He could sense it.  Yet there he was, in the narrow corridors of this dark labyrinth, unsure of which way to go.

He did not want to go back.  He tried that once.  Twice actually.  Or was it more than that?  He could not remember for he had been navigating his way through this maze for what seemed like an eternity.   Still, he did not know how to go forward.  It seemed that everything he did correctly was not enough to produce a solution to his problem.  He did not control his own destiny, and he felt as if someone else were pulling the strings.

Yet this puzzle that consumed him was not always dark and dreary.  There were moments were he was able to find light. Enough light to see the beauty around him.  The ornate patterns in the marble floors.  The art carved into the stone walls.  It was amazing. It was spectacular.  Words cannot describe the breathtaking nature of all that surrounded him.  Then just like that, it would be dark again.

He was baffled by how quickly he could go from a sense of peace and calm to feelings of panic and despair.  He did not understand how this situation, a situation into which he forced himself, got so bad.  He was on the verge of losing hope.  Of losing faith.  Of giving up.

But he’d been down that emotional road before, and somehow he always seemed to end up back here.  He had to keep pressing forward.  This was his mission, his objective.  This was his ultimate goal, and he knew he could never give up.  Like so many dreamers and risk takers before him, he lived on the idea of a life outside the maze.  He fantasized about the little, day-to-day things that would seem so spectacular when contrasted against the darkness of his current situation.  He dreamed of relishing in appreciation those things that so many took for granted.  Although he had failed before, he knew he could succeed if given the chance.  He would succeed.  There was no doubt in his mind.

But he had to get out of the darkness first.  He knew the door was there to be found, but where?  When?  He just had to be patient.  He had to remind himself this struggle was worth it.  It had to be.  He had come so far, and at one time so close.  “Just keep moving” he’d tell himself. “Just keep believing.”

Now, if only fate would be so kind.

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